On "This Is Water"

I recently watched David Foster Wallace's This is Water commencement speech (that's the transcript). Here is the video:

The speech resonated with me deeply, mostly because DFW says things I've been thinking about for a while, only in a much more eloquent, funny way.

As DFW says, here is a truth: Everything about my personal experience tells me that I am the center of the Universe. While others' feelings have to be communicated to me in some way, mine are right there. My emotions are immediate and urgent; yours are far away. I can feel the full profundity of my grief and ecstasy in a way that I can't even begin to understand yours. You are the same. We both perceive the other through our own frame of reference. A guy driving a Hummer cuts me off on the road -- how dare he get in my way? Perhaps, as DFW says, "the Hummer that just cut me off is being driven by a father whose little child is hurt or sick in the seat next to him, and he's trying to get this kid to the hospital, and he's in a bigger, more legitimate hurry than I am: it is actually I who am in his way."

There's a word, made up by the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, for the realization that every human being you see lives a life just as fulfilling, immediate, complicated, and filled with emotion as yours is: Sonder.

Feeling sonder can make you feel sad and small, but I think it's the way towards a true, genuine compassion that can transcend the most divisive boundaries. Make up stories about the people you hate. Give them all the excuses, while denying yourself those same excuses. Paint yourself as the villain, while giving them a rich, vivid life. You are only a background character. They are the hero.

DFW takes it a step farther. He says, "if you really learn how to pay attention, then... it will actually be within your power to experience a crowded, hot, slow, consumer-hell type situation as not only meaningful, but sacred, on fire with the same force that made the stars: love, fellowship, the mystical oneness of all things deep down." I'm not sure if more optimistic words have ever been spoken. The word choice is especially beautiful. The worldview DFW presents transforms an annoying, miserable situation into a sacred one, something on fire with love and fellowship. Amazing.

So what does DFW mean when he emphasizes the importance of repeating to ourselves, "This is water"? Well, at the beginning of the speech, he gives a parable about some fish:

Two young fish swim by an older one. Older one says, "The water's nice today." Younger fish says to the other, "What the hell's water?"

Repeating "This is Water" is our continual reminder to ourselves to notice the basic, human truths right in front of us. These are truths so fundamental to being human that everyone on the planet shares them. As DFW concedes, it is unimaginably hard to remain conscious of these truths. But sometimes we can catch a glimpse of it, the capital-T Truth peeking from behind the veil, and with it, understand more completely what it means to be alive and human.

-Me